I Thought God Told Me Who My Husband Was – I Was Wrong

Dear Diary,

I thought God told me he had someone for me too…how could I have been so wrong?

I spent all of 2025 believing a man whom I’d never seen was my God-promised husband. What started as a year full of hope and expectation ended with me questioning if I even still believed in God.

Waiting in vain for the moment when I’d finally be able to meet this man led to my becoming severely depressed and angry at God (and everyone around me). I obsessively built an affection for a stranger by praying, thinking, and journaling about him every single day. I even wrote letters to him that I planned to give him on our wedding day… Talk about insanity (and insane, I felt).

So what about this marriage promise was so convincing that it had me waiting for a random man to text me? Well let me explain..

More On The Topic Of Marriage

I Thought God Told Me I Was A Man’s Wife

1.) My Dating Life Felt Blocked

The beginning of this journey actually started in 2024. I had been “trying” to practice abstinence and hadn’t slept with anyone in three years (which is easy when you don’t have options). But when I moved into my first apartment, I was eager to use my new found freedom to get back on the dating scene. Deep down in my heart I was also planning on having a hot girl summer, winter, and fall lol.

But God nipped that in the bud real quick because for the whole year it felt like my dating life was blocked. I had no interest in dating apps, I was getting fewer matches than usual, and men weren’t trying to convince me to hook up with them like I was used to. The couple of times when I was going to sleep with someone, communication with them fell off suddenly.

In all those moments of failed connections, I would quietly think to myself, “My husband must be close.”

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2.) My Attempt To Sin Was Blocked

In July 2024, I met a truck driver with whom I did stay in constant contact. He was actually the inspiration for my post, 5 Things That Make Holding Conversations Difficult. Because we’d spend countless hours on the phone with me contributing little to nothing to the conversation.

During my time knowing him though, I had a strong feeling that God didn’t want me to sleep with him. I believed this was proven to me because during the three times he came to my apartment, something would always happen to prevent us from going all the way. This mostly involved him falling asleep the moment his head hit the pillow. But during the last time we saw each other, we had gotten as far as my hand being down his pants. Then without warning he fell sound asleep within a few seconds 😶.

I had convinced myself that God kept blocking our attempts because my husband was like a week or month away. And if I gave up my three years of abstinence to someone else, then it would make me extra unclean and somehow taint my future marriage. This thought would later lend to my misinterpretation of scripture.

In Hindsight #1

As I said, I thought God blocked it because it was connected to my future marriage. He had never ever blocked me before, so there had to be a special reason this time, right?

Well toward the end of 2025, after I was completely broken from the marriage promise not being fulfilled, I ended up falling back into sexual sin with someone else. If I had known I’d do this, I probably wouldn’t have misinterpreted the scripture in the first place.

For personal reasons though I do still believe God blocked me from sleeping with the truck driver. Regardless of if it was related to my future marriage or not.

3.) I Misinterpreted A Scripture (I Thought God Said I Was A Man’s Wife)

On December 21, 2024, about a week after the last time I saw the truck driver, I was mulling over Genesis 20. Which I had read the night before. That scripture is about when King Abimelech took Sarah as his wife because Abraham told everyone that she was his sister. Then one night, God told King Abimelech in a dream that he was a dead man because Sarah was a man’s wife. God also said that he prevented King Abimelech from sleeping with her so that he would not sin against him.

When I recognized the similarities between God preventing King Abimelech from sleeping with Sarah to what I believed was God preventing the truck driver from sleeping with me (by presumably causing them to fall asleep before anything could happen), I instantly said out loud, “Because I’m a man’s wife!”

Just a few minutes after coming to that conclusion, I thought God confirmed the accuracy of my interpretation.

I had asked him to confirm it by showing me the word “Yes” or “No”, and whichever I saw first would be his answer. I immediately went to journal everything that had happened thus far. Then after, I reread Genesis 20. Right there in Genesis 20:6, the first word out of God’s mouth is, “Yes“.

A flood of peace washed over me… All I could do was smile because God finally gave me a marriage promise.

In Hindsight #2

That sounds pretty convincing right? I mean I asked God to show me “Yes” or “No” and right there in the very scripture in question, coming out of God’s own mouth is the word yes!

Well. There’s some parts I left out.

As I was journaling, I had actually glanced over at one of my journals titled “Notebook” and the very first word I saw was “No”. My heart sank a little and I was like, “Nah, God. That can’t be your answer. That doesn’t feel right. How about you show me the word three times and whichever gets to three first will be your answer.“

Well right after that, I scrapped my notes, and begin rewriting my thoughts on a new sheet of paper. I instantly noticed that the first word I had written down was “yesterday” and so I saw the word “yes”. I started getting nervous and changed my prayer one more time, “Okay, God. Just show me the word plain, not sandwiched between anything and THAT will be your answer.“

It was after that that I finished writing, reread the scripture, and saw what God had said. When I think about it now, that “feeling of peace” was more like relief and satisfaction that God gave me the answer I wanted.

I Thought God Told Me I Would Meet My Husband On January 16

1.) A Pattern Of Similar Things Happened

On December 26, 2024, I was in and out of sleep when I heard my mom’s voice urgently calling, “Daijah! Daijah!” Remembering scripture, I sat up in bed and said, “Here I am, Lord.” I asked God that if it was him who was calling me, then to show me a scripture where he would speak to me. I opened my Bible and landed on Deuteronomy 8, “Do Not Forget The Lord”.

Instantly I felt convicted because I remembered that at the beginning of the year, God had shown me this same scripture in a similar fashion: I felt an impression that he had something to say, I asked him to show me a scripture where he would speak to me, then I opened my Bible and landed on Deuteronomy 8.

Curious about my exact thoughts when God first showed me the scripture, I looked through my journal. To my surprise, my entry was dated January 26, 2024, exactly 11 months prior… That was also the same day that I signed the lease to my apartment.

I felt like there was significance in God reminding me not to forget him on such a specific date.

Not only because I had the tendency to do just that whenever I had a new friend or romance. But also because I figured he was about to do something BIG for me.

So I looked through my journal again to see when I had first viewed my apartment. I didn’t write an entry that day. But going by the context of my other entries, I figured I had seen the apartment on either January 20, 2024 or January 21, 2024.

I started to shake with excitement because I was seeing a pattern forming: First God had introduced something new to me on the 21st day of the month, then he told me not to forget him on the 26th day of the month. I figured if God really was showing me a pattern then I could probably figure out when he would allow me to meet my husband!

So I checked my lease and saw that I moved into my apartment on February 16, 2024 (21 days after God told me not to forget him). Therefore, I surmised that in 21 days, on January 16, 2025, I would be meeting the man that God promised to me.

I had no idea that that day would actually be the beginning of my fall away from God.

In Hindsight #3

The entire time that I was waiting for this marriage promise to be fulfilled, I frequently went back to this pattern. Strengthening my belief that God really let me in on such a sweet secret. In my mind, the dates matched up perfectly, so it had to be God.

But remember how I wasn’t quite sure if I saw my apartment on the 20th or the 21st? Well after I was freed from deception, I remembered that I applied for my apartment online on the same day that I saw it. So I went through my old emails for the confirmation they sent and saw that I actually saw my apartment on the 20th.

Just that minor detail makes the “pattern” fall apart.

2.) I “Met” A Man On January 16 And He Matched Specific Things On My List

Because I was working from home and had no plans to even leave my house on this day, I was fully expecting a stranger to knock on my door. Or to look out my window and lock eyes with someone moving into a building next to mine.

But what actually happened was that my mom called to tell me that some new guy at her job wanted to go hiking with me.

My breath caught in my chest because I remembered my list of date ideas for when I meet my husband. There were only two written so far. The first was to go camping in my car. The second was to go hiking!

Before I could wrap my head around what my mom had just said, she began to list a description of him:

• Spanish guy from California
• Super nice to everyone
• Older than me
• Short but taller than me
• Cute

I kid you not, this description matches some very specific things I desire for a husband:

• Mexican American man, specifically from LA
• Super nice to EVERYONE
• Older than me
• Taller than me. 5’10 and up.
• Cute to most people

My husband being nice to everyone has always been my desire since elementary school. As a person with social anxiety, I need someone who accepts my quirkiness and that of others. The way my mom kept stressing over and over how nice he was to everyoneeeeeee. On top of the fact that “Spanish” and from California are crazy specific (I live on the east coast), you couldn’t tell me that this wasn’t the man God was telling me about.

In fact, as she said these things about him, it literally felt like God was holding up my list and checking things off one by one. It felt SO supernatural. I had extreme deja vu, I was lightheaded, and I could barely get out a straight sentence.

To top everything off, the man texted me for the first time on January 21, 2025. Exactly one month after God told me I was a man’s wife. This further cemented in my mind that these dates weren’t just a coincidence. I needed no more proof to believe that he was the one for me.

In Hindsight #4

Not only did his description match only the superficial things I was attracted to. But they didn’t even match them perfectly lol. I even found out later that he wasn’t from LA and didn’t have Mexican roots like I assumed. So much less specific than I thought.

What’s more is that though we only exchanged a few texts with each other, I felt no connection to him at all. His lifestyle was EXTEMELY different from mine and I had no interest in living that way. He also said some things that I knew would not align with my emotional needs. That is a non-negotiable, but I chose to ignore it since I thought he was promised to me.

3.) The Signs That Kept Me Believing In The Marriage Promise

God gave me no confirmations once so ever that this man was my husband. No matter how hard I prayed for an answer. However, here are some convincing signs that kept me deceived.

• The pattern of things happening on specific dates.
• A couple exes that I desired to hear from again randomly reached out to me after years of not speaking. One even specifically asked if I was married yet. I thought it was the devil trying to distract me from my husband lol.
• The man not only worked with my mom. But his second job was at a school my uncle attended as a kid. I felt like God was crossing him over into my life.
• I saw his name EVERYWHERE. From a system I used every day at work, to the name of the town I lived in, to hearing it on tv, to my cat having a similar name, etc.
• In June 2025, my pastor told me that God was going to give me a gift soon. Something that he wasn’t going to give to anybody else. Does that not scream a promised husband?
• I met (another) counterfeit on July 21, 2025. Which, of course, at this point, I considered the 21st to be a specific date. It was completely unintentional, as I met this person on a social anxiety forum where neither of us even had a profile picture up. He DMd me about a post I made, and we instantly formed a DEEP connection. It just so happened that he was a white guy from California who was fluent in Spanish. He was also older than me and taller than me lol.

4.) What Broke Me Out Of The Deception

I’m a firm believer that God wouldn’t give you someone that you aren’t attracted to. A God of detail who created sex and made it enjoyable wouldn’t skimp out on something as important as physical attraction. So though I had never seen him before, I had no doubts that I would be attracted to him (and him me). I thought I was walking in faith by refusing to look him up on social media.

I was fully convinced that once we finally went hiking, seeing him for the first time would be magical.

But in the last week of December 2025, I was completely over this whole situation and decided to find him on Facebook. When I found him, I saw that I wasn’t attracted to him. And judging by the women in his photos, he never would have been attracted to me either.

I know its superficial to write the whole marriage promise off because of my lack of physical attraction. But in my defense, it’s also a turn off to say you’ll go out with someone then never contact them again. And like I sorta mentioned earlier, I struggled a lot with our lifestyle difference. It doesn’t make sense for God to give me someone I’m both unattracted to and unaligned with.

Final Thoughts

This was one of the most painful experiences I’ve ever had. To have your hopes raised to ceiling. Then watch them come crashing down all around you is truly sickening like the Bible says (Proverbs 13:12). I know this was a test of my faith and I failed miserably…It’s been a year and seven months and I am JUST NOW starting to come back to God.

God still hasn’t revealed to me why this all happened. Or should I say, I have not found the strength to fervently seek the answer. I can only see this situation as a spiritual attack to steal my faith in God. I think the devil mirrored what God did for me when he gave me the apartment. That could explain why all the dates didn’t match up perfectly and why the “marriage promise” led to nothing.

I’m ashamed that the desire to have a man and to be loved left me feeling so defeated in life and faith. I worry how it would make me look since this is a Christian blog and everything I post is supposed to be rooted in Christ. But the truth is that I’m having a hard time right now because being loved is all I ever wanted. Yet it seems to keep eluding me.

Have you ever received a marriage promise that you thought was from God? If so, did you hear him right or wrong?