As a socially anxious person, I haven’t been able to make/keep friends since I was 13 years old. There’s the occasional coworker or guy from a dating site to hang out with. But since my brain won’t allow me to open up to them, no lasting connections have been made.
So believe me. I know firsthand how BORING life is without a friend (or romantic relationship). Most days are filled with just sitting around doing nothing. Not even really having anything to think about because there’s not much going on in life 😬. I don’t know about you, but living like that gets old and depressing.
In 2022, I started my official journey to overcome social anxiety and began to make little changes here and there. I’ve compiled a list of the things I started doing to break up the monotony of my life. Let’s get into it!
How To Stop Being Bored In The House:
1. Try A New Hobby
Here are a few ideas:
- Crochet/Knit/Cross Stitch
- Diamond Painting
- Build miniature dollhouses from a kit (like this example from YouTube)
- Cooking/Baking
- Scrapbooking
- Blogging
I highly recommend blogging. It gives you an outlet for your thoughts and it will keep you busy! I spend an unhealthy amount of time working on this blog. But it’s enjoyable and fun!
2. Build Legos
Contrary to what I used to think – Legos aren’t just for kids 😎.
A couple of years ago I found out that they sell sets for all ages. They range from sports cars to artwork, to themed sets like Harry Potter or Super Mario (and more). It comes with all the pieces you need and clear instructions. Plus, it’s so satisfying hearing the little Legos click together as you’re building 🥴.
Here are a couple of sets I enjoyed building:
3. Write A “Book”
Aside from just writing in a journal. Act as if you’re writing a book and retell stories from your life or dreams you’ve had.
It’s a fun way to document your memories. Also, it’s a great way to practice if you really do want to write a book someday 😊.
4. Read Books
Reading is like a cheat code for emotions. Especially if you always feel numb.
Instead of having to wait days/months/years for something exciting to happen to you and to wake up dormant feelings. Just pick up a book and in minutes you’ll be taken on a roller coaster ride of emotions…Provided it’s a book you enjoy.
It also lets you slip into another life and forget you don’t have any friends (🥹 lol).
One way I’ve been able to get back into my love of reading is by using sticky notes to jot down my thoughts or definitions or anything while reading. You can also use it as a marker to go back to your favorite scenes!
I suggest starting with a book that you think will bring on whatever emotion you want to feel.
Here are some ideas:
- Romance (ahem 👀) – Vanessa Jared’s Got A Man – LaQuette
- Excitement – Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs
- Laughter – The Wish List by Eoin Colfer
- Fear – A Head Full of Ghosts by Paul Tremblay
- Sadness – Suicide Notes by Michael Thomas Ford
- Suspense – The Heights by Louise Candlish
Some places to find books:
- Bookshop.org (every purchase supports local bookstores)
- Bargain Section in the back of Books A Million (There are some gems back there. Some under $10.)
- Book subscription boxes
How To Stop Being Bored Outside The House:
Now for the hard part…actually leaving the house 🫠. Fortunately, the things I list are catered toward those who also struggle with social anxiety. But if you need some encouragement to get out in the public, check out my post How I Started Forcing Myself Out Of The House.
1. Go To The Park
Find one that has a nice grassy area so you can have a mini picnic. Bring your blanket and favorite snacks, download something to watch on Netflix, and just relax outside.
If you don’t know of any parks near you:
- Look at your town’s website (google your city name and it should be one of the first search options).
- Look for a section named “Parks and Recreation” or search “parks” in the search bar.
- BONUS – there may also be an option on the site called “Things To Do” or similar.
2. Go For A Walk
You can walk around your neighborhood. Or you can again look at your town’s website. It may have a list of walking trails.
3. Go To The Movies
So many people go to the movies by themselves, you’d be surprised. I was worried the first time I went by myself, but nobody even gave me a second look 🤷🏾♀️. But also the trick is to go after a movie has been out for a while and during a time when it’s not that busy (mornings and/or weekdays).
I recommend going to a dine-in theater like the Alamo Drafthouse Cinema. You can order food like you’re in a restaurant and they bring it to you! The best part about the Alamo – you write your order on an order card and stick it in a slot on the shelf/table in front of you. Talking isn’t really necessary.
4. Go To The Gym
Yeah, I know. How desperate do you have to be to go to the gym for fun 😬. Lol. I mean. When you have social anxiety and no friends, the options of things to do outside of the house are kinda limited.
Going to the gym (and getting a personal trainer) was the very first thing I did to stop being bored. It gave me a destination, an excuse to get out of the house for at least an hour, and it was exposure therapy. I was able to get used to working out in front of people.
You can find a cheap membership near you. Or gym hop by signing up for free one-day passes. The downside to that of course, is you can only do it once.
5. Go To The Mall
Walk around, try on some clothes, and eat at the food court. It’s better than just sitting in bed with nothing else to do.
5. Go To Stores A Bit Further Away
Go to random stores in towns that are around 30 minutes (or more) away from you. The added time to your drive allows you to cruise around. BUT you’ll have a destination so it feels like you have some business to take care of.
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6. Find An Event On Facebook
Businesses often have things going on that they advertise through Facebook. Go to the Events section on Facebook and choose Local. You’re bound to find something.
Pick one that you feel you’d be okay doing alone and just go. Don’t even think about it. I’ve seen options for soap-making, paint nights, and food truck events. All of which don’t really require you to talk if you have social anxiety.
I went to a Winter Editable Plant Walk through one of these events. It was free and got me out of the house for 2 hours. I felt so accomplished for doing something on my own. Even though all the plants they showed were dead, it was still worth going lol.
7. Meet Ups
I’m including this one as a bonus because it’s something that some of my family members have had success in. But I personally haven’t tried it yet.
Meetup.com is a site where you can join different groups to do things with or find events that are going on. It can range from a book club meeting up at the library. Or a group of people meeting to try out a new restaurant in town. I haven’t tried it because there’s been nothing super interesting near me (and that I felt was worth pushing through my fear for). But I still wanted to include this, in case you could find something in your own town.
Final Thoughts
It can hurt having to do everything by yourself when you don’t have friends. And it can be hard to find things to do that feel manageable for your social anxiety. But hopefully, the things listed in this post will inspire you to just get out there and do something. You will feel so much more accomplished and relieved once you do.
Here’s to hoping we both find friends in this lifetime 🤪🍻
What are some things you like to do when you’re bored?
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